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But amongst English-speaking Indian Americans, the frequent use of �aunty� or �uncle� is more often an example of lazy speech, or a desire to bump the individual in question into the category of doddering older-other, than it is a thoughtful moniker of respect. I attended an art exhibition in the home of an Indian-American couple a few months back. This was clearly an example of �you�re from an older, other world, and I�m still young, and I want to put some distance between us.� Here are some guidelines for the use of the term �aunty� and to prevent against the kind of encounter I�ve just described.If you�re an Indian American, you�ll probably just call her �aunty.�" "Today, the title �aunty� is so overused and misused that it has lost its position and meaning.Indian-American children are taught that every adult female is a potential aunty; many carry this presumption to the conclusion that any adult female older than them can be an aunty. If she is between 10 and 20 years older than you, do you address her by her first name or last name?If they were not the sisters of your father or mother, or the wives of your uncles, they were close family friends who had known you since infancy and had a stake or significant interest in your well being.In a culture in which godmothers were unfamiliar, the aunty, like the �aunt� elephant in a matriarchal herd of elephants, took on that distinctive, responsible role and helped our mother defend and protect her calf.

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